Being a Healthy Bride
On this day two years ago, I was busy making and celebrating the best decision of my life. ♥
I have such fond memories of my wedding day. It was truly the happiest – and the most fun – day of my life thus far. And in terms of my body image, I’m happy to say that I felt genuinely beautiful the entire day; a negative thought did not cross my mind even once, perhaps because I was so focused on how crazy in love I was (and still am, and will always be!) with this handsome fellow.
But even though I felt nothing but happy and confident on my actual wedding day, I’d be lying if I said I was the healthiest bride I could be – both physically and emotionally. The truth is that I didn’t begin addressing my rocky relationship with food and my body until shortly after my wedding. Bummer. 
But you live and learn! Based on my experience – both on the wedding day and the months leading up to it – here is the advice I’d give to any bride-to-be who wants to be the healthiest she can – whole-self-style. 
Five Ways to be a Healthy Bride
1. Look your best, but without making any dramatic changes.
I understand that brides want to look their best on their wedding day; I certainly did. But it’s not worth making dramatic, unhealthy, unsustainable changes to reach some idealized weight or image.
A recent study by Cornell University found that 91% of engaged women were worried about their weight, and almost half were willing to take extreme measures to reach their “ideal” size by the big day – including skipping meals, taking diet pills, and even abusing laxatives and inducing vomiting. 
While I did not take any of those measures, I will admit that a few months before my wedding I restricted my food intake and over-exercised in an attempt to “look my best.” Not surprisingly, the combination of deprivation and wedding-planning-stress led to more than one over-eating episode. I hit both extremes. 
The lesson? You can look your best without disrespecting your body. Number Two has something to do with it…
2. You will look beautiful – no matter what – simply because of how happy you are.
I truly believe I looked beautiful on my wedding day. And it had a lot more to do with my joy than with my physical appearance. Super models have nothing on any bride on her wedding day; her overabundance of happiness makes her radiate with beauty. 
3. Now is the time to use your best coping-with-stress skills.
While my wedding-planning experience was mostly stress-free, the magnitude and importance of the event inevitably caused some anxiety – and I think that’s the case for almost everyone. Looking back, I wish I had had a “toolbox” of effective coping strategies to draw from throughout the ups and downs.
4. Let go of your inner perfectionist.
Because – without doubt – something will go wrong. (In my case, when we got to the end of the aisle, my dad gave me a hug…and accidentally pulled my veil right off my head. 
) But regardless of what goes wrong – be it a major issue or a minor disturbance – it’s ok. Why? Because of Number Five…
5. Remember that there’s life after the wedding.
I know what you’re thinking – DUH! 
But I think we’ve all known brides who get so wrapped up in the wedding event itself that they forget that the really important-challenging-wonderful stuff comes after the guests have gone home and the gifts have been opened. The event is important as a symbol, a public declaration. But the days, months, and years afterward are what you’re really in it for.
And now, wedding photos!
We look so nice and innocent…
But we’re NOT!
I think this might be my favorite photo from my wedding.
We’re cool like that.
I love you, Dave! Two years down, forever to go! 
If you’re married, what are your tips for being a healthy bride (or groom!)? If you’re not married but plan to be someday, what steps do you think you’ll take to be your healthiest self on the big day?
Themocracy
Happy Anniversary Katie!!
I loved seeing your wedding pictures — you look gorgeous, and extremely happy!
All of your points are really good. I can imagine that it’s sometimes hard to keep things in perspective and remember that there’s a whole life after the wedding…and that you WILL look beautiful no matter what. You put so much time and effort into planning the big day, it would be hard not to want everything to be perfect. I do hope that when the time comes I will be able to let go of that perfectionist self and not allow myself to get all that stressed. Like you said, in the end those small things don’t really matter.
Happy Anniversary! You were such a beautiful bride and your dress was gorgeous!
My advice for any bride is to forget all the silly details and enjoy the day. No one will ever care if the day wasn’t perfect, but will care if they missed the good times by focusing on the small things.
Happy Anniversary!!! You made one beautiful bride and you continue to make one gorgeous wife!
We had a long engagement (1.5 years) so I had a long time to plan. I went on Weight Watchers as soon as we’d set the date, and it helped me learn to do things slowly. My biggest issue came AFTER the wedding, when I decided I didn’t need to worry anymore… For me, the best advice I could offer would be to remember that healthy choices should be lifetime choices, not desperate attempts for a single moment! I’d also say to take a deep breath, take a step back, and KNOW that a lot of things will go “wrong” on your wedding day. You can’t stop it, you can’t control it, and when you look back on it you won’t care one bit. You might not even remember.
Happy anniversary to you both! The pictures are gorgeous!
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!! I love seeing people’s wedding phots. I am not married, but think that when it comes time for me to plan, I’m simply going to keep doing what I’m doing!! I love my relationship with exercise and food right now. I’m in a good place!
Happy Anniversary!!! Beautiful pictures! I think one of the key things I tried to remember for being a happy (and thus healthy) bride was that it was OUR wedding, and we needed to do what we wanted to do, rather than try to please everyone else. People will tell you, Oh, you HAVE to do this, and you CAN’T do that, but the truth is, there are no rules! You should do what’s going to make you happiest on that day!
You looked gorgeous!
I’ve been married for almost 5 years and was not in to food the way I am now. I mean, I was in to food, a lot of it! I wasn’t the healthy eater I am now. I was never ‘fat’, or even really overweight, just some extra padding, and I felt beautiful at our wedding. I dont’ have any tips, just marrying my husband made all negative thoughts dissapear for th day.
Ah love…
I’ll be honest – I do see myself trying to shape up a bit before getting hitched (which, at this rate isn’t happening for a LONG time, ha). But I definitely don’t want to get caught in that trap of needing to be “skinny” for my wedding. First of all, whoever I end up with is going to love me the way I look *right now,* so why try to change?? And like you said, there’s life AFTER a wedding. Why waste months and months on dieting and over-exercising for a few hours?!
With all that being said, you made a STUNNING bride. I’m glad to hear that you felt beautiful all day because it was rightfully so! You and the hubs are an adorable couple, and those wedding photos really show the happiness that you two share
Katie, I am going to be looking thru your wedding album today and remembering what a special and beautiful day it was for the two of you. Happy Anniversary!
katie oh my gosh this is SO adorable!!! wow!! I love your tips too. you were a BEAUTIFUL bride!! gah!
Happy Anniversary! It looks like a wonderful day and you are glowing! I loved the ring picture! Very cute!!
I would say that a tip to be a healthy bride is to find a dress that flatters your figure. I mean so many people have the ideals of fitting into a certain shape or a certain cut and sometimes you just have to go with what makes your body look the best! I would have NEVER in 1000 years thought that a mermaid dress would have looked good on me and overall it was the best one. So my advice would be to throw out all preconceived notions of what you think you want.
Happy Anniversary, Katie – you are an absolutely GORGEOUS bride!! I love looking at wedding photos.
Thanks for sharing them with us!
I hope to feel overwhelmingly happy on my big day, and I really hope I don’t give a thought to my size/body type. I think ALL brides – no matter what size – are beautiful. It sounds cheesy, but it’s true!
Happy Anniversary!!! Your pictures are gorgeous and your advice in right on. While I am thinner now than I was on my wedding day I still think I was gorgeous on that day. I don’t look back at photos and think negative thoughts at all. Brides put too much pressure on themselves and don’t realize that you’ll see those pictures and think of themselves as beautiful (BECAUSE IT’S YOUR WEDDING DAY!) no matter what size you are.
Happy Anniversary, Katie! You look positively radiant in your wedding photos! I can tell how much love there is between the two of you. Hope you guys have a wonderful day!
Happy Anniversary Katie!! You were GLOWING on your wedding day! The pictures (and YOU!) are beautiful!
I hope and pray that when I become engaged I will not fall into the “I need to lose weight in order to be beautiful” trap. I know that I am extremely vulnerable to such thinking, so I’m going to have to be extra careful!
I completely agree with point #2, that brides’ inner beauty and happiness shines through–no matter what their size–because they are celebrating their union with someone they love. Nothing is more beautiful than that!
Aww happy anniversary! You looked absolutely radiant on your wedding day. Your happiness really showed!
I totally agree that a bride always looks beautiful no matter what because of how happy she is.
This is so great and I’m glad you have perspective on your health; even if it is in retrospect. The pictures are gorgeous! I love weddings so much. Yellow roses are my favorite flower. You and your groom look so happy together
Happy Anniversary!
I too didn’t have a very healthy body image when I was getting married, looking back I would have worked on being happy with who I was instead of how I looked. Also, I think wedding dressess are super flattering no matter what!
Happy Anniversary!
I got married when I was 21 (yep) and I didn’t change a thing before I got married. Granted, I lived partially at home (technically I had my own place but I came home for dinner a lot), and I worked out every day because I liked to and didn’t really have anything else going on! I guess I was already pretty fit and was happy just the way I was!
I liked your point about being a perfectionist, I tripped (luckily I didn’t fall) coming outside afterwards! It’s those things that go wrong that you remember and make your wedding unique.
Happy Anniversary! You looked absolutely breathtakingly gorgeous!
I was just the maid-of-honor for my sister and learned that an important thing about enjoying your wedding day is to be laid back about it – she said “I don’t care” so many times when we were planning and I think it made the day a lot more fun that we weren’t all worried about pleasing the unpleasable bride. she knew it would be a fantastic day even if all the details weren’t exactly “right”. I agree that it’s one day and goes by in the blink of an eye, everything doesn’t have to be “perfect”. As for looking good, confidence is so important! Which includes having a dress you are comfortable in (and not buying a dress a size down, being determined to fit in it by wedding day!) and that flatters your body shape. You are so correct that the bride will always look beautiful!
Love seeing those pictures! Happy anniversary!
And I certainly think the best thing to do to be beautiful your wedding day is to not put too much pressure on yourself. It will only backfire.
Happy Anniversary! You looked absolutely beautiful and all of your decorations were just gorgeous.
Thank you, Becky!
Happy Anniversary!! You look absolutely radiant in all of your pictures…beautiful bride, and I love your dress! All I can say is enjoy every single moment of the day – it goes by fast! Savor each memory..
Happy anniversary, Katie! I’m so glad you found such a wonderful partner to go through life with…
Not only is it your anniversary, but I’ve passed on the Fabulous Sugar Doll Blogger Award to you on my blog today! Check it out!
Beautiful pictures, beautiful bride!!!!
My mantra for my wedding (well, one of my mantras) was “I want to look like myself”. A beautiful bride who looks like a stranger is a little freaky!
Also, I had a pretty stressful planning period, but it brought my husband and I a lot closer. We kept saying “If we can get through this, we’re going to make it!”. And that day, I didn’t care about anything except marrying him.
Its really the most important thing, and if you just focus on that, the stress just melts away…
Awww, love your wedding pictures!! I love your tips for being a healthy bride. Even though I felt gorgeous on my wedding day and never thought anything negative, the days after I kind of rebelled and went a little crazy with food b/c I had been restricting for so long. Needless to say I gained a lot of weight by binging afterwards and I am still battling that weight gain almost 2 years later. My only regret is not dealing with my food issues sooner before it had to get to that point.
Happy Anniversary! Wonderful pictures – your flowers were gorgeous!
I was also not as healthy as I am today when we got married. I started my weight loss/be healthier journey shortly after our wedding. Our day was perfect though – and all that matters now is that I married my best friend
I feel exactly the same way.
Happppppy anniversary!
I love the point that you will look beautiful b/c of how happy you are. Isnt that the truth. Happy people radiate beauty and you certainly looked beautiful and happy in your pictures.
Happy Anniversary! Thanks for sharing the photos, you truly were a beautiful bride. I love the picture of your cake smashed face.
Very pretty pictures, and such an adorable couple! Congratulations!
Very sweet post! Happy anniversary!
I think the most important thing when planning a wedding is to do exactly what you both want – and don’t try to make everything perfect – something’s bound to go wrong if you’re really tied up in the details! And this goes for your body too. I always say that I wanted to be recognizable in my wedding photos – I didn’t want people saying, “Wow – you were so skinny!” or “You look so different now!” since it’s pretty much inevitable that if you starve yourself before the wedding – the weight will come back on!
Aw, Happy Anniversary! I love the pictures — you guys look so young!!
I worried about my weight some, but not enough to do too much about it..ha! I felt great the entire day…my corset was tight enough to help anything out! The one thing I remember thinking is, “Why bust buns to get to an unrealistic weight for ME for ONE day, only to regain it and feel bad about myself in looking back at pictures and having attendees think, “Man, what happened to her!?”. Not worth it…not even close.
Happy Anniversary! These are beautiful pictures and you give great advice.
I must say, we had similar bouquets! I also had roses and cala lillies!
Enjoy your day! Hope you’re celebrating tonight!
Happy Anniversary! Your pictures are amazing and I loved this post!
Hi! I just found your blog and love it! I most certainly love your attitude in this post and actually passed it along to a few friends that are working on the same things in the midst of planning and working on their weddings. Off to read more of your blog now!!!
Hey, Melissa! Thanks for this comment and for sharing my blog with others – I really appreciate it!
Aww, Happy Anniversary Katie! Those pictures completely back up everything you said about being so in love nothing else matters – you look gorgeous and radiant! I only hope that if I ever get married, I look as confident and happy…even with my face smothered in cake!
As a bride getting married in 25 days, I certainly appreciated this post! You looked so happy in your photos. As the details come together, I’m trying to constant remind myself it’s on the beginning of our journey together, and how glad I am this wedding planning stress ball will be over!
It sounds like you have a great perspective! Those final days can certainly be stressful, but the day of the wedding you’ll be so happy it will all just melt away.
Happy anniversary! I can’t wait to start planning my wedding when my boyfriend gets home from Afghanistan. He asked me to send him pictures of engagement rings I like and that made me soo happy.
Anyway, leading up to my wedding, I really want to work on stress management and my perfectionism. That will lead to a healthier me because when I get stressed, I forget to eat and lose my appetite and just generally don’t take care of myself like that. I want my wedding planning and day to be as peaceful as it can be.
happy anniversary!
you made a beautiful bride! i loved all the pics..thanks for sharing…and I must say what an AWESOME POST yet again! I have a lot of friends that are engaged and NEED to read that so i’ll be passing it on! it’s so sad to see those stats on women hurting themselves to look a certain way! thanks for sharing! you are a beautiful woman and i just know that you are truly a light to many!
Thank you for this lovely comment, Katie!
Aww you look absolutely perfect! Those are some great tips. My wedding was pretty stressful and unfortunately I was glad to have it finished. :/ Happy to be married though!
[...] my good friend Melissa. She sent me a fantastic post from Katie at Health for the Whole Self called Being a Healthy Bride. It really resonated with me so I wanted to share it with all of [...]
Hello Katie!! Melissa from Trying to Heal sent me your post and I must tell you that it really resonated with me. I’m currently planning my October wedding and have been growing through a lot of mental drama over physical issues that aren’t even issues. You looked absolutely STUNNING – and your tips for being a healthy bride are phenomenal. I’m sharing it with my readers and wanted to let you know that you are now my inspiration. Glad I found you and your blog!
Happy Anniversary – your wedding photos were amazing, thank you for sharing. I can relate to a lot in this post – will definitely forward it on to engaged friends.
[...] Brides-To-Be: You absolutely must check out the Comments section from my last post on being a healthy bride. Some people shared some really wonderful tips; they are definitely worth reading before walking [...]
Wow you look beautiful! I didn’t realize how close both of our 2 year anniversaries were. And our wedding and engagement rings almost look identical! I agree with all of your points. Number 5 is my favorite. The days after your wedding are what is most important.
It sure seems like we have a lot in common, doesn’t it?!?!
Congrats on your wedding anniversary and thanks for sharing the beautiful photos!
Katie, happy anniversary! You look beautiful, and I love your pictures. The flowers are sooo pretty, too.
Thank you for addressing this topic, because overexercising and undereating are serious issues for brides-to-be. I love your suggestions! You’re always so positive and honest, which I really appreciate.
Happy anniversary! Once I found a dress that fit me perfectly, I decided that I wouldn’t try to lose any weight for the wedding, and it was a great decision! I had been yoyo-ing for years, and just allowing myself that breather was a huge relief. I focused on HEALTH and HAPPINESS, and I felt fantastic and beautiful on the big day. In terms of stress, the best advice I received was “when you’re stressing about wedding details, just focus on your groom and how much you love him. The details, though nice, don’t matter.”
That is great advice! And isn’t it amazing how free we feel once we simply stop trying to lose weight?!?
Aww, happy (belated) anniversary, Katie
You two are so beautiful together! I think your tips for being a healthy bride are great – thanks for sharing them with other brides out there!
You looked absolutely beautiful! I wish I hadn’t been so involved in feeling “fat” and bad about myself that I would have even gotten a wedding dress. My husband and I opted to elope and much of my reasoning was because I didn’t want to buy a size whatever wedding dress. I know it would have been between an 18-20 and I just couldn’t face it. I took diet pills, dieted and ended up heavier than ever for my wedding day. In my wedding video I noticed that I looked about 5-6 months pregnant and it brought me to tears to see. I have lost about 30lbs since then but at one point I had lost 60lbs. I have since regained some – thanks a lot dieting! So I am working on getting back in tune with my body and hoping to lose some of this weight naturally – because I know my body can do it, it’s done it before. I think I have just forgotten how! I am learning! Wish me luck and I hope it doesn’t take TOO long.
My impatience is always what gets the best of me!
You are absolutely right that your body can do it – you just have to take that leap of faith and commit to listening to it! I say don’t worry about what’s happened in the past and put all of your focus into taking care of yourself – physically and mentally – right now. You deserve to live life to the fullest!
Thank you so much Katie! You’re a shining example that this can work and be the best way to live. I really started tuning in this weekend when away camping and even though I ate whatever I wanted (and surprisingly, I didn’t want that much sweet stuff, but I craved fruit and salad and a little peanut butter and a few other things), I didn’t gain at all! Yay! I was kind of frightened that I would but thought, oh well, I NEED to do this no matter what! So I listened (and what better place then out in nature!) and I heard! I felt no guilt in eating when my body said it was hungry, I tested to make sure I was truly hungry and when I was, I ate. If I started to lose interest in my food, it tasted less delicious or my body gave me “I’m getting full” signals, I stopped. I am so relieved and so excited to continue this way of life and announce that I am “GIVING UP DIETING FOREVER!!!” YAY!!!! You’re site is so inspirational to me! Thank you!
WOO HOO!!! I’m so excited for you!!!